Chicago *** - If musicals are always prone to artificiality and unlikely plot developments - if only because the real world isn't full of people spontaneously breaking into song - then this example of the genre is doing better than most. At least it has a point to the sudden flights of fantasy and ends up serving something of a lesson in the brevity of modern-day celebrity.
The Last King Of Scotland **** - A staggeringly powerful performance from Forest Whitaker as General Idi Amin, the increasingly paranoid military dictator of Uganda, towers over this film almost from the very first scene. The story is told through the eyes of Amin's fictional Scottish doctor and confidante, who finds himself helplessly woven into the fabric of the General's violent politics. Even when laughing amongst friends and even at his most vulnerable, Whitaker's characterisation is never less than menacing and sometimes outright dangerous. The threat that he is about to do something unspeakably evil counterpoints nicely with the surprising bursts of humour scattered throughout the film, which help showcase Amin's legendary charisma and add shreds of humanity to his brutal nature.
Enchanted *** - An unfortunate example of the type of film that has all the best bits in the trailer, this fails to live up to its billing (Princess Bride for the twenty-first century?) An animated fairytale princess is thrown into our modern hectic world, where she gains a third dimension, although not much of one, and may just be about to change the life of a little girl and her single father. Whether you can stomach the film depends, at best, on your attitude to musicals and, at worst, your response to dangerous levels of saccharine.
The Science Of Sleep ** - Michel "Eternal Sunshine" Gondry leads us on another labyrinthine journey through a dysfunctional relationship, but the writing falters without Charlie Kaufman's flair. As a result, the film is an impressively disjointed mess of reality and illusion, with a hint of menace that does not suit the nominal romance being played out. However, it's hard not to admire the work Gondry has put into the practical effects and one can readily imagine that the film would have been great fun to shoot.
Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull *** - Preposterous even by the standards of its own franchise, this is still an entertaining, if over-long, entry in the series and clearly marks the way for future sequels. The action is wisely updated by a decade or two, so there are USSR KGB agents but no Nazis in sight. However, the most visually and emotionally striking sequences all occur in the opening twenty minutes or so, which means that the remainder of the film feels like something of a let-down.
This Film Is Not Yet Rated *** - Documentary investigating the seemingly arbitrary nature of the American film industry's censorship panel. The conclusions reached are somewhat predictable (that it's conservatively-run, secretive, and geared up to protecting the interests of the big studios rather than smaller artists). But there are humorous touches and small, satisfying victories on the journey.
Mr. & Mrs. Smith ** - Whether this is supposed to be a straight action film or a metaphorical take on the trials of modern marriage scarcely matters - it's so ridiculous that the only option is to switch off brain, suspend disbelief and watch slack-jawed as two of Hollywood's most attractive people try to kill each other.
King Arthur ** - This take on the old legends probably sought to do what Prince Of Thieves achieved - tell a familiar but great story within a plausible historical context. However, this particular retelling of the Camelot stories is excessively revisionist and, other than the name, ignores hundreds of years of story-telling by some of our leading poets and authors. Clive Owen lacks the gravitas required for such a supposedly great leader and Keira Knightley does herself and her career absolutely no favours whatsoever.
Tuesday, 1 July 2008
Tuesday, 1 April 2008
Quarterly film roundup - January to March 2008
Blood Diamond *** - Leo DiCaprio dons his best Seeth Eefreecan accent as a ruthless mercenary diamond dealer who may or may not have a little compassion in his heart. Overall an adequate thriller but could have been edited down to a keener run-time.
Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason ** - Goes to great lengths to repeat every single one of the most humorous gags from the first film, to generally unamusing effect. Where a new concept for a joke is introduced, more often than not it misfires. If Bridget Jones is supposed to be a hero to modern women, then why on Earth must this film (and, presumably, the book) attempt to mine comedy from far-Eastern women's jails and lesbianism?
Atonement **** - Very effective and affecting costume drama exploring a girl's guilt at a one-off case of childish jealousy and its devastating repercussions. Amongst the emotional anguish, it might by easy to overlook the film's technical achievements: an astonishing one-take Steadicam scene set on a wartime French beach is both low-key and dazzling, natural and virtuosic.
Serendipity *** - Two strangers meet by chance and feel a connection - but she's evidently a bit of a hippy, because she feels that their relationship should be governed by supernatural forces. This is a quirky, non-traditional rom-com which is mostly rather sweet. It's a bit unfortunate that love triangles tend to leave victims in their wakes, however, because while her partner thoroughly deserves to be ditched for the romantic ideal, his partner is entirely blameless.
Singin' In The Rain **** - They don't make 'em like this any more. While some of the songs are all-too-apparently selected to showcase MGM's catalogue rather than to drive the story, it's still brilliant, with catchy tunes, wit, charm, absolutely hilarious jokes, and that classic rainy set-piece.
Beauty And The Beast *** - Disney's award-winning take on the tale is let down in places by the odd non-sequitur, uneven plot development and some irritating "humorous" banter, and the well-known set-piece (swooping down from the ballroom ceiling) has lost some of its shine in the light of more recent advances in animation technique. But it still has romance and charm to spare.
Letters From Iwo Jima **** - The second of Clint Eastwood's pair about this wartime island conflict is told from the Japanese point of view and is markedly superior to Flags Of Our Fathers. The story attempts to explain the Japanese mentality: their dogged refusal to give up on their hopeless task; their ever-prevailing sense of honour. And, even as it condemns the officers for their cruelty, the film cannot help but be an awe of the men's courage.
Ice Age ** - Raucous, annoying and even tedious in places, this is the story of a prehistoric migration in which all the animals band together to escape onrushing disaster. The film fails to notch up the tension sufficiently quickly, the animals aren't sufficiently cute to hold a younger audience's interest, and the inclusion of comic vignettes involving a single-minded squirrel seem to be an admission on the part of the filmmakers that the film overall just isn't that funny. And an attempt to address important issues of identity and belonging fall flat, mainly because the character in question refuses to discuss them in any way.
Ice Age II *** - An improvement on the original, but no classic, this is essentially a take on the road-movie genre but with added sabre-toothed tigers. This time, the jokes are funnier, including some nice flights of fantasy that recall the wackier daydreams in Scrubs. Furthermore, the film doesn't try to burden itself with such awkward issues as before - this time, it's a simple theme of good vs. bad and doing the "right thing".
Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason ** - Goes to great lengths to repeat every single one of the most humorous gags from the first film, to generally unamusing effect. Where a new concept for a joke is introduced, more often than not it misfires. If Bridget Jones is supposed to be a hero to modern women, then why on Earth must this film (and, presumably, the book) attempt to mine comedy from far-Eastern women's jails and lesbianism?
Atonement **** - Very effective and affecting costume drama exploring a girl's guilt at a one-off case of childish jealousy and its devastating repercussions. Amongst the emotional anguish, it might by easy to overlook the film's technical achievements: an astonishing one-take Steadicam scene set on a wartime French beach is both low-key and dazzling, natural and virtuosic.
Serendipity *** - Two strangers meet by chance and feel a connection - but she's evidently a bit of a hippy, because she feels that their relationship should be governed by supernatural forces. This is a quirky, non-traditional rom-com which is mostly rather sweet. It's a bit unfortunate that love triangles tend to leave victims in their wakes, however, because while her partner thoroughly deserves to be ditched for the romantic ideal, his partner is entirely blameless.
Singin' In The Rain **** - They don't make 'em like this any more. While some of the songs are all-too-apparently selected to showcase MGM's catalogue rather than to drive the story, it's still brilliant, with catchy tunes, wit, charm, absolutely hilarious jokes, and that classic rainy set-piece.
Beauty And The Beast *** - Disney's award-winning take on the tale is let down in places by the odd non-sequitur, uneven plot development and some irritating "humorous" banter, and the well-known set-piece (swooping down from the ballroom ceiling) has lost some of its shine in the light of more recent advances in animation technique. But it still has romance and charm to spare.
Letters From Iwo Jima **** - The second of Clint Eastwood's pair about this wartime island conflict is told from the Japanese point of view and is markedly superior to Flags Of Our Fathers. The story attempts to explain the Japanese mentality: their dogged refusal to give up on their hopeless task; their ever-prevailing sense of honour. And, even as it condemns the officers for their cruelty, the film cannot help but be an awe of the men's courage.
Ice Age ** - Raucous, annoying and even tedious in places, this is the story of a prehistoric migration in which all the animals band together to escape onrushing disaster. The film fails to notch up the tension sufficiently quickly, the animals aren't sufficiently cute to hold a younger audience's interest, and the inclusion of comic vignettes involving a single-minded squirrel seem to be an admission on the part of the filmmakers that the film overall just isn't that funny. And an attempt to address important issues of identity and belonging fall flat, mainly because the character in question refuses to discuss them in any way.
Ice Age II *** - An improvement on the original, but no classic, this is essentially a take on the road-movie genre but with added sabre-toothed tigers. This time, the jokes are funnier, including some nice flights of fantasy that recall the wackier daydreams in Scrubs. Furthermore, the film doesn't try to burden itself with such awkward issues as before - this time, it's a simple theme of good vs. bad and doing the "right thing".
Tuesday, 1 January 2008
Quarterly film roundup - October to December 2007
Angel-A ** - A desperate small-time crook is saved from committing suicide by a beautiful woman who may or may not be an angel - although if she is, she's a highly unconventional one. A typically stylised, black-and-white film from Luc Besson, there is exceptional beauty to be uncovered in its more whimsical scenes, but this is marred by a lack of chemistry between the man and his saviour, by the lead being essentially unlikeable, and by a thoroughly disturbing subtext of misogyny and sexual violence.
Flags Of Our Fathers *** - The first in Clint Eastwood's pair of films about the American attack on the Japanese island of Iwo Jima explores the complex emotions and relationships of a small band of soldiers feted as heroes due to their involvement in a staged reconstruction of an heroic moment. As such, the film strives to comment on the artificiality of media and the need of any political campaign to have its icons - as relevant today as ever.
Ratatouille *** - A beautifully-animated, if wildly implausible, Pixar tale about a rat who loves fine cuisine. Patience and repeated viewing does help to draw out the heart from the tale; unfortunately, at first sight, the story and execution seem a little too cold and clinical.
Gulliver's Travels (TVM) *** - An epic and comprehensive retelling of Daniel Swift's most famous work, with Ted Danson in the title role. A surprisingly complete and involving experience.
The Hunchback Of Notre Dame **** - Disney's animation seems to take as its cue the musical adaptation of Les Misérables - and indeed, the comparisons are legion. Apart from source material by the same author, there are thematic similarities; for example, a blurring of right and wrong and a villain who believes himself to be righteous. Even the musical set-pieces are staged and shot like a live-action musical. Altogether, an effective piece of work.
Caché *** - A disturbing and occasionally deliberately confusing thriller in which a normal couple suddenly start receiving video cassettes showing themselves, as filmed by a hidden cameraman, going about their daily lives. As they investigate, they must come to terms with a dark past. The tension is palpable.
Flags Of Our Fathers *** - The first in Clint Eastwood's pair of films about the American attack on the Japanese island of Iwo Jima explores the complex emotions and relationships of a small band of soldiers feted as heroes due to their involvement in a staged reconstruction of an heroic moment. As such, the film strives to comment on the artificiality of media and the need of any political campaign to have its icons - as relevant today as ever.
Ratatouille *** - A beautifully-animated, if wildly implausible, Pixar tale about a rat who loves fine cuisine. Patience and repeated viewing does help to draw out the heart from the tale; unfortunately, at first sight, the story and execution seem a little too cold and clinical.
Gulliver's Travels (TVM) *** - An epic and comprehensive retelling of Daniel Swift's most famous work, with Ted Danson in the title role. A surprisingly complete and involving experience.
The Hunchback Of Notre Dame **** - Disney's animation seems to take as its cue the musical adaptation of Les Misérables - and indeed, the comparisons are legion. Apart from source material by the same author, there are thematic similarities; for example, a blurring of right and wrong and a villain who believes himself to be righteous. Even the musical set-pieces are staged and shot like a live-action musical. Altogether, an effective piece of work.
Caché *** - A disturbing and occasionally deliberately confusing thriller in which a normal couple suddenly start receiving video cassettes showing themselves, as filmed by a hidden cameraman, going about their daily lives. As they investigate, they must come to terms with a dark past. The tension is palpable.
Monday, 1 October 2007
Quarterly film roundup - July to September 2007
Tideland ** - At the beginning of the DVD of this self-consciously macabre, fiercely-offbeat film by Terry Gilliam, the directory himself pops up onscreen. He pleads with the audience to see the film for what he is, and he delivers a heartfelt (if excruciating) expression of gratitude to the little girl at the centre of the story. And small wonder that he feels the need to excuse his work and to thank his star (or his character); this child is placed through the sorts of indignities one wouldn't wish on anyone, from looking after her dead and decomposing drug-addict father, to exploiting the sexual urges of a local simpleton. This is a deeply troubling, voyeuristic film and whether or not Gilliam intended it to be a celebration of childhood resilience - of the ability of a young mind to protect itself by wrapping itself in fantasy - doesn't make it any less uncomfortable to watch. Like Pan's Labyrinth, the exotic fantasy cannot begin to atone for the grim reality.
Dirty Pretty Things **** - A British immigrant makes a grim discovery in the bathroom of the hotel where he works illegally and is faced with an impossible dilemma. He cannot go to the authorities, yet he cannot allow such inhuman barbarism to continue. Showing an underbelly of British culture rarely explored on screen means that it is hard to judge the true-life accuracy of the story. But the central performances are extremely compelling, and the lines between good and evil are sufficiently blurred to allow for the outcome to be in some doubt.
Volver *** - A young girl kills her abusive father and is protected from the obvious consequences of the crime by her mother. Life starts to improve, despite being overshadowed by a mysterious - maybe even ghostly - figure from the past. Like many Spanish dramas, or so it seems, this one deals with strong women characters and about the relationship between child and mother. Its benign supernatural element, rather than adding a new dimension to the drama, seems more like a quirk deliberately inserted to give more depth, but this does remain a slickly-executed film.
The Simpsons Movie *** - Every once in a while, a film is so eagerly anticipated that it can only disappoint. The question then is, by how much? What margin for failure does a television show as successful and beloved as The Simpsons have? On the plus side, there are plenty of strong laughs to be had. But it's not a particularly memorable experience, particularly when the TV series does have so many memorable gags, albeit ones that have been repeated ad infinitum. One is left desperately hoping that the forthcoming Futurama television movies will offer something more substantial.
Die Another Day ** - Even by the standards of most Bond movies, this is wildly-implausible - sometimes even completely baffling - entry in the girls 'n' gadgets genre. Nothing, from the opening credits onwards, gels properly or makes much sense. And, seen with the hindsight of the excellent Casino Royale, it is perhaps a very good thing that this was Brosnan's last outing as the suave superspy.
Lovers Of The Arctic Circle *** - A film about coincidences, about tiny choices having profound effects, and of life's occasional savagery. It's mostly a handsome production, but the deliberately obfuscated conclusion greatly lessens its dramatic impact.
Paris, Je T'Aime *** - Eighteen leading filmmakers from around the world shoot a short film each, each on the topic of love, here strung together into a single two-hour anthology that seems to go on much longer. The best of the stories are humorous, memorable, and moving. Some are just surprising. The problem is not even that some of the stories aren't very good: it's more that there are just too many. Pick and choose eight or ten and you might have a superb film. Hopefully the DVD will allow just this; maybe it will even have a jukebox function. But over the course of eighteen segments, the ensemble's flaws are obvious. For a start, it's too uneven. And even the rules laid down by the producer haven't been followed consistently. While most directors have chosen the topic to mean romantic love specifically, this is not always the case. However, as a quick introduction to directorial style, it works surprisingly well: Tom Tykwer's segment is like having the essence of Run Lola Run distilled into five minutes, for example, and the Coen Brothers, Sylvain Chomet and Gurinder Chadha likewise. But at no point does it convey the supposed magic of Paris; with only five minutes or so each to tell a story, none of the directors felt like allowing their romantic backdrop more than a mere glance of screen time.
Road To Perdition *** - A frustrating, but meticulously made and beautifully shot, gangster film, whose biggest crime is to depend overly on cliché. As a result, key plot points will be obvious to most viewers well in advance. Its roots as a graphic novel are occasionally exposed, with an uneven story and line sketches where characters should be. For all its pulchritude, Road To Perdition lacks the depth it aspires to. There are many better examples of bad-man-as-good-guy films out there.
Dirty Pretty Things **** - A British immigrant makes a grim discovery in the bathroom of the hotel where he works illegally and is faced with an impossible dilemma. He cannot go to the authorities, yet he cannot allow such inhuman barbarism to continue. Showing an underbelly of British culture rarely explored on screen means that it is hard to judge the true-life accuracy of the story. But the central performances are extremely compelling, and the lines between good and evil are sufficiently blurred to allow for the outcome to be in some doubt.
Volver *** - A young girl kills her abusive father and is protected from the obvious consequences of the crime by her mother. Life starts to improve, despite being overshadowed by a mysterious - maybe even ghostly - figure from the past. Like many Spanish dramas, or so it seems, this one deals with strong women characters and about the relationship between child and mother. Its benign supernatural element, rather than adding a new dimension to the drama, seems more like a quirk deliberately inserted to give more depth, but this does remain a slickly-executed film.
The Simpsons Movie *** - Every once in a while, a film is so eagerly anticipated that it can only disappoint. The question then is, by how much? What margin for failure does a television show as successful and beloved as The Simpsons have? On the plus side, there are plenty of strong laughs to be had. But it's not a particularly memorable experience, particularly when the TV series does have so many memorable gags, albeit ones that have been repeated ad infinitum. One is left desperately hoping that the forthcoming Futurama television movies will offer something more substantial.
Die Another Day ** - Even by the standards of most Bond movies, this is wildly-implausible - sometimes even completely baffling - entry in the girls 'n' gadgets genre. Nothing, from the opening credits onwards, gels properly or makes much sense. And, seen with the hindsight of the excellent Casino Royale, it is perhaps a very good thing that this was Brosnan's last outing as the suave superspy.
Lovers Of The Arctic Circle *** - A film about coincidences, about tiny choices having profound effects, and of life's occasional savagery. It's mostly a handsome production, but the deliberately obfuscated conclusion greatly lessens its dramatic impact.
Paris, Je T'Aime *** - Eighteen leading filmmakers from around the world shoot a short film each, each on the topic of love, here strung together into a single two-hour anthology that seems to go on much longer. The best of the stories are humorous, memorable, and moving. Some are just surprising. The problem is not even that some of the stories aren't very good: it's more that there are just too many. Pick and choose eight or ten and you might have a superb film. Hopefully the DVD will allow just this; maybe it will even have a jukebox function. But over the course of eighteen segments, the ensemble's flaws are obvious. For a start, it's too uneven. And even the rules laid down by the producer haven't been followed consistently. While most directors have chosen the topic to mean romantic love specifically, this is not always the case. However, as a quick introduction to directorial style, it works surprisingly well: Tom Tykwer's segment is like having the essence of Run Lola Run distilled into five minutes, for example, and the Coen Brothers, Sylvain Chomet and Gurinder Chadha likewise. But at no point does it convey the supposed magic of Paris; with only five minutes or so each to tell a story, none of the directors felt like allowing their romantic backdrop more than a mere glance of screen time.
Road To Perdition *** - A frustrating, but meticulously made and beautifully shot, gangster film, whose biggest crime is to depend overly on cliché. As a result, key plot points will be obvious to most viewers well in advance. Its roots as a graphic novel are occasionally exposed, with an uneven story and line sketches where characters should be. For all its pulchritude, Road To Perdition lacks the depth it aspires to. There are many better examples of bad-man-as-good-guy films out there.
Friday, 27 July 2007
Gloucester floods
I'm very touched by the sheer quantity of emails, text messages and Facebook posts from friends across the UK expressing concern following the recent severe flooding in Gloucester. Even people I haven't spoken to in months or years have been getting in contact to ask if I'm OK. Some people who haven't even been to Gloucester have been asking after me, and after my Gloucestrian friends and colleagues, and offering all sorts of help. Even friends and acquaintances from Gloucester itself have been getting in touch to ensure I'm OK. I am extremely grateful for each and every message of support.
The truth is, I've had it very easy indeed compared to the vast majority of people in this city. My house is some twenty metres above the level of the Severn with only very small feeder streams anywhere nearby. I've spent most of the week putting on weight in a guesthouse in Sussex (it's a combination of the fried breakfasts and the expense account that does it) and enjoying the hot shower there. As a result of this cowardly exodus, much of the rest of this text is based on second-hand information.
I've arrived back this Friday evening to discover that I still have running water. To all intents and purposes, then, I haven't had any interruption to my water supply at all. I'm extremely perplexed by this state of affairs, as the next roads to the east, south and west are all still being supplied from bowsers in the streets, and Churchdown, the next village to the north, is ditto. I can only assume, until I'm told to the contrary, that Severn Trent have managed to fill a local reservoir (Chosen Hill?) with non-potable water. This is in direct contradiction with their own website, which has me right in the middle of the drought zone. It's all rather mysterious. Severn Trent's press release says that the temporary measure in place in Tewkesbury cannot be expected to supply the majority of the 130,000 affected homes across north Gloucestershire - and I'm nowhere near Tewkesbury.
This text was supposed to be a photo-journal of the current situation, but after two hours of motorcycling around Gloucester and Cheltenham this evening, I honestly couldn't find anything that was worth snapping. If you've seen one roadside water tank that looks like a large blue plastic Dalek, well, then you've seen them all.
The weather here right now is fine, although heavy rain is expected over the weekend once more. The roads are certainly dry, apart from a couple of places outside of town where small streams are draining from fields. Apart from the bowsers all over the place, and the occasional person wandering around with a couple of buckets trying to find a full one, you'd be hard pressed to identify anything wrong. Gloucester Festival is currently in full swing, and although it's muddy in the fairground in Gloucester Park, it's nothing out of the ordinary.
Look more closely and there are a few other clues. Many businesses, especially pubs and restaurants, have closed their doors. Others (including my own place of work, but also several pubs that I passed) have hired in portable toilets. In one outlying village, a particularly thoughtful parish council has hired in toilets for the use of the villagers. But many places are, somehow, just getting on with it. Plenty of local hostelries have that tell-tale gaggle of smokers outside their front doors, indicating business as usual.
The situation unfolded like this.
Last Friday afternoon, the weather was so spectacularly inclement that many colleagues opted to leave early in order to get home. This turned out to be a very good idea. My team, being highly conscientious employees, stayed until the usual finishing up time - well, almost - before trying to depart, only to discover that every route north of Gloucester was blocked. The M5 was so badly congested that hundreds of people had to sleep in their cars overnight. Other routes, including the A40, A417 and A46, were closed due to flooding. Minor roads, including Churchdown Lane near to my home, had deep water collecting in dips and were impassable. The A38 on the west side of Gloucester was open, but unreachable from the east side. Initially, everyone thought that it would be best to get some dinner at the pub and try again later. With the rain continuing and traffic still not moving by late evening, however, P. and S. both sensibly decided to stay at my house overnight. L., meanwhile, was trapped at work, due to a deep torrent of water running down the road cutting her off from her own car (actually, T.'s car, which she'd borrowed for the day). She cracked open the wine and tried to make the best of it.
On Saturday, the weather was considerably better. Gloucester city centre was bustling and busy during the day, with no obvious signs of the weather beating it had received. However, it was on Saturday that the (possibly apocryphal) story emerged of an idiot who approached a bridge with a water depth marker reading just below seven feet. He carefully moved a line of cones out of the way of his car and proceeded into the floodwater, only to crash immediately into a completely submerged vehicle in his path. That the story has already taken on the status of urban legend is indicated by some of the embellishments that I've heard, including that, as he was pulled from his terminally-damaged and now submarine vehicle, he tried to fend off his rescuer with the words, "Never mind me - what about my car?"
By Sunday, the extent of the devastation was becoming clear. The beautiful market town of Tewkesbury was almost completely submerged. H. in Quedgeley and R. in Tuffley, in the southern parts of Gloucester, reported that power and water had been cut. There were angry scenes at supermarkets across the city as fights over bottled water began to break out. People began to fill their baths and whatever vessels they could find with the last of the mains supply.
On Monday, businesses were trying to establish how they could function effectively without a fresh water supply. Bowsers started to be deployed, although Severn Trent was finding it difficult to keep them filled: their tankers were too large to fit into the residential roads where they were sited.
It was at this point that yours truly, having filled a very nice collection of old wine and beer bottles with drinking water, decided that the best course of action was to run away for the week.
A. reports that on Tuesday, although most people had their power restored, there were still queues panic-buying water at supermarkets. At Morrisons in Abbeydale, customers near the front of the queue were loading their trolleys with all the water they could physically carry, then selling the bottles to people further back in the queue at a markup of 500%. This is probably not what is being described as the "Blitz spirit". One "entrepreneur" attempting to sell water from the back of a van was reportedly hounded out of Gloucester by an angry, violent mob.
On Wednesday, news reports and some personal anecdotes indicated that there was some vandalism of water bowsers. Furthermore, A. reports, some local youths were deliberately draining all of the water out of bowsers as soon as they were filled. The BBC reported that one idiot had broken the seal on the top of a bowser and urinated into it. Both these tales make it into the list of the week's most depressing stories (along with the tragic case of the man shot dead for asking people not to smoke) that prove once and for all that mankind is doomed.
On Thursday, the police were handing out bottles of water to passing motorists. This seems to me to be a bizarre policy. After all, driving along in a private motor car is one of the times when one would not expect to have access to fresh drinking water. One might have assumed that the police had better things to do, and that fresh drinking water would better be targetted at the elderly, the infirm, and the housebound.
This brings us up to date. By Friday, things are evidently considerably more organised. Supermarkets have larger water tanks, while the vans of local companies are supplementing those hired by Severn Trent to keep bowsers filled. The bowsers are mainly blue plastic, standing on their own moulded plastic base or mounted on a trailer. Some are older metal tanks, on loan from other water companies. Larger containers are either the Dalek-shaped ones previously alluded to, or are mounted within a metal frame with reflective strips. Many have pieces of paper attached reading "WATER", although only a few bother to add "BOIL BEFORE USE".
There are bowsers at intervals along major roads. Groups of smaller roads have their own bowsers at a suitable junction. Severn Trent is maintaining a list of their locations. Some are sited in peculiar places, such as one on Abbeymead Avenue, away from any of the junctions with residential streets.
Despite the reports of vandalism, there is not much in the way of an obvious police presence at most. One bowser on Bristol Road had a couple of PCSOs standing nearby when I passed, but they appeared merely to be chatting amiably to the man filling his bottle. In fact, the only possible sign I saw of any disturbance was at the former B&Q on Trier Way. Being a large disused car park central in the city, several large tanks are sited here and there was a significant police presence, although even here, the officers seemed mainly to be managing the traffic rather than dealing with any unpleasantness.
So that's that: it's not the apocalypse, although it might well seem like it to those who live near to the Severn or Avon at Tewkesbury. There are plenty of stories of quiet heroism (although the best one - the rescue of 150 cats and dogs - actually occurred during the last round of flooding in June) and many stories of barely credible stupidity and quite spectacular selfishness.
Update 30/07/2007: Today's news about flooding in China puts the entire disaster into perspective. 119 million people affected, 450,000 homes destroyed, 650 dead.
Fascinating fact of the day. The word "bowser" is defined both by Chambers and by Dictionary.com as referring exclusively to portable containers for fuel, not water.
The truth is, I've had it very easy indeed compared to the vast majority of people in this city. My house is some twenty metres above the level of the Severn with only very small feeder streams anywhere nearby. I've spent most of the week putting on weight in a guesthouse in Sussex (it's a combination of the fried breakfasts and the expense account that does it) and enjoying the hot shower there. As a result of this cowardly exodus, much of the rest of this text is based on second-hand information.
I've arrived back this Friday evening to discover that I still have running water. To all intents and purposes, then, I haven't had any interruption to my water supply at all. I'm extremely perplexed by this state of affairs, as the next roads to the east, south and west are all still being supplied from bowsers in the streets, and Churchdown, the next village to the north, is ditto. I can only assume, until I'm told to the contrary, that Severn Trent have managed to fill a local reservoir (Chosen Hill?) with non-potable water. This is in direct contradiction with their own website, which has me right in the middle of the drought zone. It's all rather mysterious. Severn Trent's press release says that the temporary measure in place in Tewkesbury cannot be expected to supply the majority of the 130,000 affected homes across north Gloucestershire - and I'm nowhere near Tewkesbury.
This text was supposed to be a photo-journal of the current situation, but after two hours of motorcycling around Gloucester and Cheltenham this evening, I honestly couldn't find anything that was worth snapping. If you've seen one roadside water tank that looks like a large blue plastic Dalek, well, then you've seen them all.
The weather here right now is fine, although heavy rain is expected over the weekend once more. The roads are certainly dry, apart from a couple of places outside of town where small streams are draining from fields. Apart from the bowsers all over the place, and the occasional person wandering around with a couple of buckets trying to find a full one, you'd be hard pressed to identify anything wrong. Gloucester Festival is currently in full swing, and although it's muddy in the fairground in Gloucester Park, it's nothing out of the ordinary.
Look more closely and there are a few other clues. Many businesses, especially pubs and restaurants, have closed their doors. Others (including my own place of work, but also several pubs that I passed) have hired in portable toilets. In one outlying village, a particularly thoughtful parish council has hired in toilets for the use of the villagers. But many places are, somehow, just getting on with it. Plenty of local hostelries have that tell-tale gaggle of smokers outside their front doors, indicating business as usual.
The situation unfolded like this.
Last Friday afternoon, the weather was so spectacularly inclement that many colleagues opted to leave early in order to get home. This turned out to be a very good idea. My team, being highly conscientious employees, stayed until the usual finishing up time - well, almost - before trying to depart, only to discover that every route north of Gloucester was blocked. The M5 was so badly congested that hundreds of people had to sleep in their cars overnight. Other routes, including the A40, A417 and A46, were closed due to flooding. Minor roads, including Churchdown Lane near to my home, had deep water collecting in dips and were impassable. The A38 on the west side of Gloucester was open, but unreachable from the east side. Initially, everyone thought that it would be best to get some dinner at the pub and try again later. With the rain continuing and traffic still not moving by late evening, however, P. and S. both sensibly decided to stay at my house overnight. L., meanwhile, was trapped at work, due to a deep torrent of water running down the road cutting her off from her own car (actually, T.'s car, which she'd borrowed for the day). She cracked open the wine and tried to make the best of it.
On Saturday, the weather was considerably better. Gloucester city centre was bustling and busy during the day, with no obvious signs of the weather beating it had received. However, it was on Saturday that the (possibly apocryphal) story emerged of an idiot who approached a bridge with a water depth marker reading just below seven feet. He carefully moved a line of cones out of the way of his car and proceeded into the floodwater, only to crash immediately into a completely submerged vehicle in his path. That the story has already taken on the status of urban legend is indicated by some of the embellishments that I've heard, including that, as he was pulled from his terminally-damaged and now submarine vehicle, he tried to fend off his rescuer with the words, "Never mind me - what about my car?"
By Sunday, the extent of the devastation was becoming clear. The beautiful market town of Tewkesbury was almost completely submerged. H. in Quedgeley and R. in Tuffley, in the southern parts of Gloucester, reported that power and water had been cut. There were angry scenes at supermarkets across the city as fights over bottled water began to break out. People began to fill their baths and whatever vessels they could find with the last of the mains supply.
On Monday, businesses were trying to establish how they could function effectively without a fresh water supply. Bowsers started to be deployed, although Severn Trent was finding it difficult to keep them filled: their tankers were too large to fit into the residential roads where they were sited.
It was at this point that yours truly, having filled a very nice collection of old wine and beer bottles with drinking water, decided that the best course of action was to run away for the week.
A. reports that on Tuesday, although most people had their power restored, there were still queues panic-buying water at supermarkets. At Morrisons in Abbeydale, customers near the front of the queue were loading their trolleys with all the water they could physically carry, then selling the bottles to people further back in the queue at a markup of 500%. This is probably not what is being described as the "Blitz spirit". One "entrepreneur" attempting to sell water from the back of a van was reportedly hounded out of Gloucester by an angry, violent mob.
On Wednesday, news reports and some personal anecdotes indicated that there was some vandalism of water bowsers. Furthermore, A. reports, some local youths were deliberately draining all of the water out of bowsers as soon as they were filled. The BBC reported that one idiot had broken the seal on the top of a bowser and urinated into it. Both these tales make it into the list of the week's most depressing stories (along with the tragic case of the man shot dead for asking people not to smoke) that prove once and for all that mankind is doomed.
On Thursday, the police were handing out bottles of water to passing motorists. This seems to me to be a bizarre policy. After all, driving along in a private motor car is one of the times when one would not expect to have access to fresh drinking water. One might have assumed that the police had better things to do, and that fresh drinking water would better be targetted at the elderly, the infirm, and the housebound.
This brings us up to date. By Friday, things are evidently considerably more organised. Supermarkets have larger water tanks, while the vans of local companies are supplementing those hired by Severn Trent to keep bowsers filled. The bowsers are mainly blue plastic, standing on their own moulded plastic base or mounted on a trailer. Some are older metal tanks, on loan from other water companies. Larger containers are either the Dalek-shaped ones previously alluded to, or are mounted within a metal frame with reflective strips. Many have pieces of paper attached reading "WATER", although only a few bother to add "BOIL BEFORE USE".
There are bowsers at intervals along major roads. Groups of smaller roads have their own bowsers at a suitable junction. Severn Trent is maintaining a list of their locations. Some are sited in peculiar places, such as one on Abbeymead Avenue, away from any of the junctions with residential streets.
Despite the reports of vandalism, there is not much in the way of an obvious police presence at most. One bowser on Bristol Road had a couple of PCSOs standing nearby when I passed, but they appeared merely to be chatting amiably to the man filling his bottle. In fact, the only possible sign I saw of any disturbance was at the former B&Q on Trier Way. Being a large disused car park central in the city, several large tanks are sited here and there was a significant police presence, although even here, the officers seemed mainly to be managing the traffic rather than dealing with any unpleasantness.
So that's that: it's not the apocalypse, although it might well seem like it to those who live near to the Severn or Avon at Tewkesbury. There are plenty of stories of quiet heroism (although the best one - the rescue of 150 cats and dogs - actually occurred during the last round of flooding in June) and many stories of barely credible stupidity and quite spectacular selfishness.
Update 30/07/2007: Today's news about flooding in China puts the entire disaster into perspective. 119 million people affected, 450,000 homes destroyed, 650 dead.
Fascinating fact of the day. The word "bowser" is defined both by Chambers and by Dictionary.com as referring exclusively to portable containers for fuel, not water.
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